Saturday, June 6, 2009

To Everything there is a season

We are trying to adjust to the news that we heard this past week. Our son Ethan has been battling neuroblastoma cancer for almost 2 years now. We found out that we have no other options to help him with his disease and we are coming home today to keep our boy comfortable at home. It's amazing as I'm sitting right next to him as I type this and he is painting some wooden cars with blue and red paint. We've moved on from painting cars now to painting the hospital table.....I'm sure we've paid for it! He still makes us laugh!

Don't worry, someday I'll be back to this stamping world....that is what got me through all of this in the first place. I wouldn't be on here now except Ethan was needing a little time to himself because he was mad that we had to give him some oral medicine! Thanks so much to all of you that I have never met that have prayed for my son and our family. Here's one of my favorite pictures of Ethan.


To everything there is a season,

a time for every purpose under the sun.

A time to be born and a time to die;

a time to plant and a time to pluck up that which is planted;

a time to kill and a time to heal

...a time to weep and a time to laugh;

a time to mourn and a time to dance

...a time to embrace and a time to refrain from embracing;

a time to lose and a time to seek;

a time to rend and a time to sew;

a time to keep silent and a time to speak;

a time to love and a time to hate;

a time for war and a time for peace.
ecclesiastes 3:1-8

68 comments:

Tracey Cuccia said...

Oh Alicia...I don't have the words to tell you how sorry I am...I can't even imagine what you are going through...{{{HUGS}}} I'll be praying...

{pam} said...

i am so sorry . . . i can't even begin to imagine how hard this has to be for you . . . will keep you and your sweet little ethan in my thoughts . . . huge {{{{{{{hugs}}}}}

Dana said...

Alicia, I don't even know what to say...may the world surround you and Ethan and your family with love and support more than ever before. So many hugs to you all.

Deb said...

I am so sorry! Please know that you and your family will be in my thoughts and prayers.

Anonymous said...

Alicia..... I can't even speak as I read your blog today.... All I can say is that everything happens for a reason and only the Good Lord knows WHY!!!!!! My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family ...
Melissa from WI

Denise ~ Paper Ponderings said...

I am blessed to read your family story and uplifted by your faith in God. Thank you so much for sharing. I will continue to pray for your family.

Barb said...

Alicia, I am sooo sorry. I cannot imagine how hard this is and what you must be feeling. No child/parent should ever have to go through what you guys have!!! I'll keep Ethan and your family in my thoughts and prayers!!! Huge Gigantic {{HUGS}}!!!

Stampin' Pam said...

Blessings and prayers to you and the family, Alicia - heartfelt sympathies for all you are dealing with and yet hanging in so well.

mosaic1 said...

Alicia..I don't think I have ever left a comment but I've followed your blog for a long time. I am so sorry. I can only pray for a calm and peaceful journey. Know that many many people care.......

Corné said...

Dear blogger friend,
I've never met you and only happened upon your blog today, but I'm deeply touched by your sharing. What can I say? Can only pray that God will wrap you and your family in His comforting arms at this very hard time...

mamia said...

The strenght you are showing right now is such a testimony, I know God is with you and that is where it comes from. May His hand rest on you and Ethan in the days to come. Prayers for your entire family.

Jen Tapler said...

Oh Alicia! I am only just now getting to know you and I know that nothing I say now will be adequate at expressing how sorry I am. Please know that I am thinking of you. I am going to e-mail you privately as there is something I'd like to do for you, but need to discuss with you. Big hugs girl.

Lauren (mytime) said...

Alicia I can't even begin to phathom what you are thinking and feeling. I'm guessing the ONLY word would be numb.Maybe shock and disbelief? Im not his mom and that is how i feel for you. I am heartbroken over this. I cried a small river for you today. As a mom I can only begin to imagine. I just dont know what to say.I wish I could be there for you in some way. My the feeling of God's loving arms surround you, and give you peace and comfort. I can't help but feel that life is unfair, and don't know the purpose in so many things.I know its not fpor me to know or understand, it is just so hard sometimes. Im still praying for you all-always.
Hugs from all of us here.

Anonymous said...

I happened upon your blog some time ago and didn't book mark it, but would 'find' you every once in awhile thro other bloggers. (but I have you bookmarked, now!) I was always interested in reading how things were going for you and your dear son, Ethan. You are an inspiration to all of us. The strength you show, your love & faith are amazing and I admire you. I am praying for you and your family through this very difficult time. Keep the faith...

Maria Levine said...

Alicia, I am so sorry to hear this. BIG HUGS to Ethan, you and your family!

Aviator girl said...

I don't know you or your family but just reading about what you guys are going through right now beaks my heart. I will say an extra prayer for Ethan and your family!

Leanne said...

My heart breaks for you and your family. Big hugs to all of you. Praying for you all.
Love,
Leanne

Renee V. said...

There are no words... just a heartful of love for you, Ethan and your family.
Although we've never met - we're all still "family" in a way...
I can't even imagine what you are going though - just know that you are in my thoughts and prayers.
Love and hugs,
Renee

Teri Mosby said...

Alicia, This news breaks my heart. Know that everyone is praying for you and your family to find the strength to make it through..Big Hugs your way..Teri

Gail S. said...

Like many of the others, we have never met but I have kept your family in my prayers. I will continue to pray for you all and may God take you all in His arms and wrap His love around you all. We never understand why things happen and continue to wonder but He has His reasons. God Bless you all. Gail S.

Jill S said...

Dear Alicia, I pray that God with hold each one of you close and surround you with his love. With continuing prayers.

Jill
N Ireland

MacKenzie said...

My heart is breaking for you right now. Enjoy every moment...

Anonymous said...

Alicia, you and your family are in my thoughts. The photos of Ethan's smiling face has lit up your blog each time I check back to read. May you build many wonderful lasting memories with your family.

Nicole
Australia

Anonymous said...

Alicia,
Your family remains in my prayers. Enjoy every moment you have with Ethan and always cherish those moments. God Bless you all-
Prayers-
Kim

Agustina said...

Alicia, my heart is aching for you and your precious family. May God help ease the pain in all of you, and may he comfort you in his arms. Know that many of us who don't know you and your family are often praying for Ethan and your family as well. You are one of the bravest woman I know. God is always at your family's side. Prayers and Hugs,
Agustina

beth said...

Alicia, I don't know what to say ....no words will comfort you at this time. But I will pray for you and your family. God can and will help you through this difficult time. I will pray and pray hard.
May God Bless, comfort you and your family, and heal Ethan.

Carly S said...

Dear Alicia,

My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family. I don't know you, other than your blog, but I feel like I do. You seem to be so strong, and little Ethan needs you. I have been praying for your family. I pray for a miracle. I don't understand why things like this happen. Only God knows why, and that there is a reason for everything. I do know that God gave Ethan you, so that you could be his mother. No one can take care of him and love him the way that you do. Embrace every moment that you can.

Blessings,

Carly Spalding

Debbie said...

Just wanted to say how sorry I am about your news. I will be praying for all of you. I wish there were words that would help you, but nothing seems adequate....I hope knowing that so many people care helps in some little way.

Kelley Eubanks said...

I have followed your blog for just a little while after I read about Ethan on Lauren's blog. I don't even have words to say to you! My heart hurts so much for you! I have a 2 year old son and I just don't know how to comprehend what you are going through! I am praying for your family! I am so sorry that this is happening to your precious little boy!

Priscilla Heistad said...

I found your news from Lauren Meader's site and I will be praying for your family and your Ethan. My nephew was diagnosed with neuroblastoma when he was 14 months old. He had a tumor growing near his lung and it was successfully removed.

I will be praying for your little one and you as you walk through this valley. With love, Priscilla

Beth said...

Praying for all of you!!

Terri said...

Alicia, My heart is breaking for you and your family. I can only image how hard this how to be for you. I wish there was something I could do or say to make this better but I know I can't. Just know that you all will continue to be in my thoughts and prayers.

Wendi said...

I continue to pray for you all. God's strength to each of you at this sad time. Thank you for sharing your story. Although I don't, I feel like I know you all and I truly do hold you in my heart and prayers.

Kimberly Crawford said...

Alicia, there aren't any words, so just know that I am praying fervently for you and your family right now. ((((((((HUGS)))))))))

Vicki said...

Hello Alicia, The internet is a wonderful thing.. it connects all of us that are so very far away. I know that you are helping someone by sharing your story and that in some way... all your blog followers are trying to help you as you cope with this. I wish there was something I could say or do to help you right now. Just know that I am praying for you and your family and will continue to. God bless you Ethan and keep you safe in his arms.

Marla said...

May God give you the strength to endure what you are going through. Many care and are praying for you. May God give comfort to Ethan. When words seem insufficient...God is sufficient.

Mary said...

I just heard the news that Heaven has gained a cowboy. My heart aches for your loss, but know that now Ethan is watching over you and is no longer in pain. We will be praying for you!

Kristin Bueter said...

May God bless you, Dave, Ava and the rest of your family that seems so close-knit. I'm also crying a small river for you guys, though I know Ethan is in a better place with his beloved Sonador, watching over his beloved family. Words can't express, my friend. Know you are still and will always be in my prayers.

God will take care of your angelic cowboy.

Lots of love,
Kristin

Heather said...

Alicia,

I am so sad for you right now.

I have not been blog hopping in a while, but I wanted to stop by as I have seen that picture of Ethan in my side bar of my blog for a few days and have been meaning to come by and see what is new.

I some how lost the address to his care page and I have tried searching on Care Pages for it but have not found it so I have not been able to keep up with your family that way for a while.

I am so so so so sorry Alicia, I do not know how anyone other than God can give you any comfort right now!!! I have never even met you or Ethan, but I feel so much sadness for you right now, yet I guess we should be rejoicing that Ethan is going to be with his Maker very soon and he will feel no pain then. God has given you a great gift of his love even if it was for such a short time. Ethan had a purpose in this world and though we may not know what it was just yet there is someone or something that was touched by his sweet life as so many of us have been!!!

I truely can not imagine what you are thinking or feeling just enjoy every moment of his sweet time with you!!!

My 6 year old said somthing the other day that sort of blew me away.

I don't go shopping often but I had taken her close shopping with Mommy and she reads so well now. We were in a store with T-shirts that had sayings all over them. I usually do not let the kids have any of them because the sayings can be quite rude at times.

Well she came over and she said Mommy...Yes Piper??? Mommy that shirt over there is written so inappropriatly!!!! (Here I had to take in that a 1st grader had just used the word inappropriatly in the right context) I said why is that Piper??? She said Well Mommy that shirt says It is All about Me.

Mommy it is not all about me it is all about The Lord and they need to not right it is all about me on a T-Shirt.

Wow the things they can come up with!!!

Alicia My thoughts ane Prayers as always are with you, your Ethan, Ava, Hubby, and even your Baby on the way!!! Please let me know if I can do anything at all for you!!!

Enjoy your babies!!!

Heather Schlatter

Tanya said...

My heart is broken for you. My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family!

Anonymous said...

I am so sorry for your loss. I am a Leukemic survivor and my daughter is a primary bone cancer survivor. I know how precious life is each day. Ethan and your family will be in my thoughts. I just don't get it!

Softangelkisses said...

My HUGS & PRAYERS to you and your family :o)

Annabelle said...

I´m so sorry for your loss. I know no words can bring comfort in a time like this. I know God is there for you and your family and will be by your side thru this time. I know that Ethan is in a better place, where there is no pain, only happiness and in the presence of Jesus. Your family is in my prayers and hold tight to your memories of Ethan and that beautiful smile of his that will guide through this time.
Hugs

Julie Masse said...

My heart breaks for your family right now but I am praying that God surrounds you with His peace and love today and in the difficult days ahead!!!

Denise ~ Paper Ponderings said...

So sad for your loss, but also rejoicing in knowing that he is with Jesus! What a sweetness that brings to the circumstances, and comfort it must bring to you knowing that you will get to see him again. Your strength and faith is such an incredible testimony to the Lord. Prayers, tears, and smiles.

Anonymous said...

Precious Ethan..so loved and taken from those he loved too soon. May you love sustain each other and your friends hold you up. I have read many beautiful posts of tribute. I am deeply touched and moved by Ethan, your family and your blog friends.

Anonymous said...

My God hold you in the palm of His hand during your grieving and healing.

rosie said...

I am so sorry!! You and your family are in my thughts and prayers!!! Big hug

Debbie Fisher (debbiedee) said...

I read about Ethan on Lauren's blog. I'm praying right now for you and your family.

Renee V. said...

Oh Alecia... I am so sorry.. so very sorry. My heart is just breaking for you. Heaven did indeed get a sweet little cowboy.
I've been praying and will continue to do so.
Please know that you are loved and being thought of during this difficult time.
Hugs and prayers~
Renee

Kirsten said...

I have no words, Alicia. I'm so so sorry. I will pray for you and your family.

Gina K. said...

I am heartbroken for you. You are in my prayers.

Sue said...

My heartfelt sympathy to you for the loss of your beautiful and amazing son.

Agustina said...

Although I don't personally know your family I feel like I do. My heart aches for you and your family, Ethan Is now in heaven watching over your family as he rides his beloved Sonador. May God continue to give you strenght and you may feel his comfort hugging you!!! May God Bless you and your family.

Marisa said...

As a mom my heart goes out to you in a huge way and I can only imaging the emotions you are going through right now (((hugs))). I pray you will sense God's loving arms around you and your family as well as His peace that passes all understanding as you walk through this valley in your life.

I am thankful for a mother's heart that can treasure many wonderful memories and I pray God would use those memories to fill you with strength in the days you don't feel you have any. Remember too that God lost His son for a time as well so He knows exactly where you are at - lean on Him and let His gentle hands pick up the pieces of your shattered heart and make it whole again with a very special stamp on it that represents Ethan and the way he touched your lives and the lives around him.

The Wired Angel said...

I am so sorry for you, your husband and Ava. I did follow for quite a long time on Caring Bridge.. but then I just couldn't anymore bear to read what you were all going through. God Bless you and your wonderful little cowboy. With prayers, Peggy M

Margaret Brown said...

Coming from a mother that buried her son almost 12 years ago, I know the pain that you are going thru. Try and take comfort in knowing that he doesnt hurt anymore and someday you will see him again. He is smiling down on you and your family right now.

beth said...

Our prayers are with you and your family. May God comfort you. Take care of yourself.
Beth

Elise said...

I too, have visited your blog before, through challenges, etc. My darling friend, Dana is on Lauren's team and has a tribute there for your precious boy. I JUST HAD to come by and share some love and prayers: for whatever it's worth. I am SO.. DEEPLY sorry. May the hardest and saddest of memories leave you the soonest, so that you can cling to the beauty of Ethan's life and remember all of the things that made you smile, laugh and burst with joy...

God bless you.

KarenB said...

Alicia,

No words can express my deepest sympathies to your family at the loss of Ethan. I did not know you or the story until I saw today on Lauren's blog of his passing but your family will be in our thoughts and prayers. I have a sweet friend who also lost her little girl in the last few months to cancer.

Justine said...

Alicia, please know that there are people all over the world (even Sicily) praying that God will give you grace and comfort you and your family now. Unfortunately I know that feeling of loosing a child and I won't try to compare, I just know how tremendously, overwhelming that pain is and will be for a very long time.
I am so sorry for your loss,

Donna Baker said...

Hugs to you & your family; Ethan had a smile worth a million bucks and I'm sure everyone was blessed to have him for the short time he lived on this Earth. God Bless You and may He hold you in the palm of His mighty hand as you deal with the days, months and years without that ray of sunshine!

Anonymous said...

I found your family through stamping and have followed your story for about the last six months. When Sondar died I felt that was a so unfair of the greater power to take something from Ethan that was so dear to him. I now know that was just part of the greater plan and so when your cowboy made his greatest ride his best pal would be what he rode on. There are no words that can be said that justify your loss... hugs to Ava.

Jeanette R. Burke said...

Your family is in my thoughts and prayers. Stay strong you know that's what he would have wanted. And know that he is watching over you everyday.

Katy said...

I am so sorry for your loss! Heaven had definitly gained an Angel.

Keesh said...

Alicia,
I am so saddened to hear of your loss. I can't even begin to imagine how hard this must be for all of you. I think your words from Ecclesiates, really sum up our purpose for life, and i hope they provide some comfort for you. May God surround you with His love and care, and give you the strength to keep on going. My thoughts and prayers are with you.
Love Keesh x

Kristy Geddes said...

So sorry on the loss of your beautiful little son. Hope he gets to ride all of the bulls and buckjumpers to his hearts content in cowboy heaven. Hugs to your family, we are all thinking of you.
luv,
Kristy

Carolyn King said...

I am sitting here in tears....I can only imagine what you are going through. I lost my first child 14 years ago last week (he only lived for a day) and I just cannot imagine loving a sweet child that long and having to say goodbye.

I just felt compelled to leave a note and let you know that you and your husband and daughter are in my prayers. You have your very own angel looking over you.

HUGS and xoxo.
Cammie